


Without Him

by faithlessone



Category: Mass Effect - All Media Types, Mass Effect: Andromeda
Genre: F/M, Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-27
Updated: 2017-04-27
Packaged: 2018-10-24 17:55:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,030
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10746852
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/faithlessone/pseuds/faithlessone
Summary: Liam hates it when Ryder goes out without him.He also hates how much he hates it.





	Without Him

**Author's Note:**

> (This was literally supposed to be a short little 500 word piece because I felt bad about not taking Liam to Khi Tasira in my 2nd playthrough... Then 2000 words of quasi-canon explanation happened. Also - it's my 6th anniversary of being on AO3. Enjoy! :D )

Liam hates it when Ryder goes out without him.

He also hates how much he hates it.

It isn’t as if he’d ever been one of  _those_  guys. You know, the ones who need to know where their partners are every second, get jealous when they spend time with their friends without him, that kind of thing. Possessive. Controlling. It’s just not him. He's always been easy.

He keeps reminding himself it wouldn’t be practical for her to take him out every time. It’s not like it was on Habitat 7, just them against the galaxy. Now, their squad is made up of six people with distinct skillsets and areas of expertise. And she’s the Pathfinder; she has to deal with plenty of different problems and errands on any given day. She doesn’t always  _need_  a crisis specialist.

Still, that doesn’t stop him being just a little bit disappointed whenever she calls someone else to load out instead of him.

He  _likes_  fighting beside her. Peebee teases him about taking a protective position when they're in battle, and, well yeah, he does. She's the Pathfinder. She's important. 

But it's not that he likes fighting beside her  _just_  because he wants to protect her.

Ryder in battle...  _Fuck_. He doesn't know  _anyone_  who fights like her. It's like she's everywhere at once. He's not sure how much of it is just her and how much is SAM in her head - he doesn't really understand the science of it, but he can't argue with the results. He needs to work twice as hard as he’s ever worked, just to keep up with her.

It’s not just the fighting though.

Ryder’s like a magnet. Like one of those heroes in the vids he loves watching. Things just happen when she’s around. They meet people he never would have met without her. Come across problems no one even knows about. Not just problems though. Good shit too. Helping people.

Experiencing it via a comm in his ear, stuck on or near the Tempest just in case she needs him after all, it's just not the same.

She takes him for the big stuff though. Missions with a high likelihood of things taking a swift nosedive into chaos. He was with her for that first vault, rescuing the Moshae, the Salarian Ark. So when she calls them up to the meeting room and tells them all the ghost thing is done and she’s ready to hit Meridian, in his head he’s already half-suited-up, trying to remember if he installed that new mod to his pistol when Vetra gave it to him or if he still needs to do that and...

"Peebee, Jaal? Load out."

He has to run it through his head a couple of times. Peebee and Jaal. She only ever takes two. No room for him.

When he looks up, she's already gone. He follows the rest of the squad down to the research deck, brain still trying to process the idea of her hitting the no-doubt-kett-infested-remnant-hellhole that clearly waits below them without him.  _Without_  him.

Is this because... Is she trying to protect him? Or worse, does she think he'll get distracted trying to protect her? That stupid football match at Prodromos. Just a bit of fun, he'd promised, and then he'd gone and told her he wanted to have a serious relationship with her. Maybe she’s worried about it affecting how they work together.

(Not that it has.)

"Ryder?" he asks, not sure how he wants her to answer. 

"It's remnant tech, remnant tech we probably haven’t ever seen before, so I need Peebee, and if Meridian is anything like those old ruins on Havarl or that ice cave on Voeld, I really should take Jaal." The words spill out in a flood, like she's been rehearsing it in her head and needs to get it out before he questions her.

He nods, smiles, keeping his mouth shut, holding his fears deep inside where they can’t hurt her. If she _is_ worried, he’s not gonna make it better by arguing with her. And well, they’re good reasons. Logical.

Gil’s checking the squad’s gear. He goes over to help, carefully keeping the atmosphere light. Makes a joke about their first date falling from the shuttle over Habitat 7. It gets her to smile back at him, and he’s glad. Can’t let her be distracted wondering if they’re okay when she’s got to do an air drop over unknown enemy terrain. Just before they leave, he double-, triple-checks her seals, ignoring the grin that Gil isn’t even trying to hide.

Liam hates it when Ryder goes out without him.

He can’t sit still. Honestly, he finds it hard to sit still at the best of times, but when Ryder’s fighting and running and exploring without him, it’s a million times worse. Adrenaline courses through him almost as bad as it would be if he were down there too. Worse, probably. Down there he could take out the tension taking out remnant. Or kett. Or both. Next to her.

Even though there’s only three less people than usual, the ship feels huge and empty and wrong. Suvi kicks him out of the flight deck for pacing. Being in Ryder’s quarters feels weird without her. Vids just make him more restless when he’s in this kind of mood. He ends up in the cargo bay, comm in ear, doing inverted sit-ups with his legs over the railing.

Vetra emerges from her office, giving him that look, the one that would be a single-eyebrow-raised on a human face. Amused but a little unimpressed. “If you break your skull, first I’m going to get Lexi to fix you and then I’ll make you clean up the blood.”

She doesn’t mean it. Probably. He swings up and back over the railing anyway.

“Don’t you have anything better to do?” she asks.

He shrugs. His skin still feels itchy. In his ear he can hear Ryder laughing. Fight must be going well. Fuck, he misses her. How is it possible that he _misses_ her? She hasn’t even been gone an hour.

Vetra’s face softens, as much as it ever does. “Try to take your mind off it. Mission won’t go any easier with you up here driving yourself nuts.”

She’s right. She’s usually right, he’s found. Even if he doesn’t always agree.

There _is_ a thing he could do. Something he’s been trying to piece out in his head for the last couple of weeks. He throws Vetra a grin and goes up to the tech lab. Jaal won’t mind him poking around while he’s out.

Figuring out the specs, making his crazy idea into a workable piece of tech takes as much of his brain as he hoped it would. He still keeps his comm in (just in case), half-listening to her puzzling out a trap, working through what sounds like an amazing alien structure, the squad’s excited talking punctuated by short bursts of fighting. His idea isn’t working quite like he imagined it would. He runs a few simulations through the system, watching the tiny figures blow up over and over again.

 _Not_ the ideal scenario.

The voices on his comm fade into the background as he tweaks the settings. It’s better that way. If he can’t be there in person, he’d rather hear her telling him about it. They’ll buzz his comm if they need him.

Another hour or so passes by, but he barely notices. The little sim people are still exploding or plummeting to their deaths in a variety of not-fun ways. The comm in his ear is getting loud. Lots of fighting. Something big. He tries to block it out as best he can. The adrenaline is getting itchy under his skin again. SAM will tell him if Ryder’s injured. They have a deal.

Something finally clicks in his head. He changes a couple of components, and runs another sim.

Perfect.

All he needs is to fabricate it. Which… will require the Pathfinder’s authorisation. Shoot.

Gil pokes his head around the door.

“They’re prepping for extraction. Just thought you might want to know.”

And his whole body relaxes.

She emerges from the airlock a short while later, sweaty and grinning. Peebee pushes past her, heading straight for the escape pod, dragging Jaal by the wrist. He… isn’t going to ask about that one. Not yet.

Not when he suddenly has an armful of Ryder.

He hugs her back as tight as he dares, irrationally happy to have the physical confirmation that she’s still alive, she’s still fine, she’s still his.

“Hey you,” he says, mostly into her hair.

“Hey you,” she says back, mostly into his chest. Then she pulls back, grinning up at him. “Meet me downstairs? I’ve got some stuff to do. Then I have to tell you _everything_.”

“Sure.” He falters for just a second, wondering how much to tell her about the surprise he’s planned that he now needs her help with. “I’ve got another favour to ask.” She raises her eyebrows, questioning, but he just grins. “When you’re done.”

By the time she’s checked in with all the rest of the crew, replied to her emails and done all the other myriad little admin jobs she invariably has piled up on top of her, he’s almost lost his nerve. What if she thinks it’s a stupid idea? She said she wanted to be serious, that didn’t mean she necessarily wanted to be jump-off-a-cliff-with-him serious.

Then he sees her slightly sleepy, mostly happy grin as she finds him waiting in her quarters. Like she’s forgotten she asked him to do just that.

“There you are,” she says, almost falling headlong into him for the second time that day. He wraps his arms around her, helping her to a more secure position against him on the sofa.

“So,” he prompts, unsure how to start. Usually that’s her job. “What was it like down there?”

“Mind if I tell you in the morning?” she asks, her eyes half-closed, a touch of a yawn in her voice already. “Adrenaline crashes are the _worst_.”

He’s happy enough just to have her back. The details can wait. “No worries. Do you want to go to sleep?”

“Not yet,” she sighs, resting her head against his chest. “So what’s this favour you want to ask me?”

He doesn’t want to put anything more on her shoulders tonight, but it’s somehow easier now that she can’t see his face. “Can you run some specs through the research station?”

She frowns, pulling back to look up at him. “Not much of a favour, Kosta. What are they?”

He tries to keep his face neutral. “It’s a one-time jump-jet mod. Once the project is done, I’ll set a marker on Eos. Then you’ll see the result. This one’s… just for us, Ryder.”

She wants to ask more questions, he knows, but he also knows she’ll respect his decision not to tell her. It’s one of the things about her that he’s most drawn by, the way she trusts them all so easily. She just smiles at him. That wonderful smile that she gave him right before they snuck away from the football match.

“What do you want to do, if not sleep?” he asks, trying not to sound suggestive and failing.

She tilts her head back, giving him a careful, considering look. “Hmm… I could do with a shower. A nice, long, hot shower.”

As soon as she says it, he mentally kicks himself. Selfish dick. She’s just had a long mission, fighting who knows what and running about all over the place. Of course she needs some private down time and a hot shower. He releases his arms from around her, giving her his hand instead so she can push herself up from the sofa. He watches her leave the room.

A few seconds pass.

“Kosta?” she says, poking her head back around the door. “That was an invitation. Just... in case you didn’t notice.”

Oops.

He chases after her.

Liam hates it when Ryder goes out without him… but he loves it when she comes back.


End file.
